Chris Kelly

I am lucky to know many great, hilarious and smart people and am always consistently overwhelmed by their work. Here is a completely random (and insanely incomplete) list of things I love on the internet that my friends have made recently. If you have not seen one of them, please please please check them out. I hope to do this often because: why not? My friends are neat.

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- “Broad City” by Abbi Jacobson and Ilana Glazer

This is a web series that is smart and interesting and funny and - without trying to sound precious - has something to say. It’s also a sweet celebration of living in New York and I love every single bit of it. Some of my favorite episodes are Date Night and I Heart New York.

- Mike Scollins’ Sketches 

I feel like I’ve seen a parade of sketches from Mike recently, mostly produced through Maude Night at UCB in New York, that are really, really hilarious. The actors in the sketches are great too, but THAT WRITING. I particularly like I Bought A Gun.

- Fran Gillespie on Twitter

There are a shit-ton of funny people on Twitter, but Fran, more than anyone else, makes me laugh so fucking hard almost every time she tweets something. She is also hilarious in real life. Here are a few I particularly like:

But how come they don’t make band aids for black people?

Robin Williams improvised the line, “Uh-oh, watch the monkey” in Disney’s Aladdin.

And as she left the audition where she pretended to catch a giant pumpkin, Green Day’s “Time of Your Life” played, and it was perfect.

- “Full Benefits”, a College Humor web series

I love this web series so much. Each episode is hilarious and exactly the right length, and does a great job of combining story-telling with the most amount of funny, one-liner jokes possible. It’s written by Sarah Schneider and David Young (who I actually don’t know, but is great) and this season co-stars my friend Cody Lindquist as David’s insane new girlfriend.

- Splitsider.com, Editor Adam Frucci

This website is amazing. Great articles, great interviews, great everything. I visit it probably ten thousand times a day. I especially love Sarah Schneider’s recent porn parody reviews.

- “Teen Wheels”, by Emily Strachan, Kelly Hudson and Dan Klein

In my opinion, this web series is everything you need to know about these three people. It’s fucked up and filthy and makes me laugh because it’s so fucking stupid/funny. 

- Ari Scott’s 365 Days Photo Project 2.0

For the second time, Ari is taking a photo of herself every day for a year. And they’re amazing. One of my favorite things about doing comedy is when someone who’s hilarious shows off another talent altogether. Her pictures range from beautiful to sad to weird to tired to celebratory, but they’re all great.

He passed.

#humblebrag

I was in Minnesota last weekend, and I saw my mom’s cousin Tim, who I had not seen since I was a small child, at a family get-together. I met him while he was telling people about this recent conversation he had with a woman:

Woman: (getting herself a beer from a six-pack of beer)
Tim: Why drink from a six-pack when you can have a whole keg? (lifting up his shirt, pointing to his enormous stomach)
Woman: (walking away) I’m not that thirsty. 

Tim then found out that I do comedy and decided to pitch me a couple of ideas. I am still contemplating which one to make first and would love everyone’s input! Here they are, almost verbatim:

STAND-UP IDEA:

“Something about when you’re waiting in line for a movie and you get so fucking angry. And the irony in that.”

SKIT IDEA:

“There’s these three guys and they believe in reincarnation and shit for whatever reason, and they’re driving along together and they all decide that when they die, they wanna come back as fuckin’ women’s vibrators. Then, outta fuckin’ nowhere, this big fuckin’ semi-truck comes and hits them and then they’re all dead. Next thing they know, they wake up on this shelf. And they’re women’s fuckin’ vibrators!!! But then three women walk into the room, and they’re all fat fuckin’ chicks, and they look at each other and they’re like ‘Oh, shit! Oh no!’. And then somethin’ else happens.”

MOVIE IDEA:

“It’s called ‘Live Like You’re Dying’ and it would star Tim McGraw. And it’s about this guy who finds out he has cancer or some shit, and so he goes and he spends all his money, and then at the end of the movie, he goes back to his doctor, and the doctor is all like, ‘Woops, I fucked up. I was reading someone else’s chart. You’re NOT dying.’ And then Tim McGraw’s all like, ‘Shit’.”

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If any of you would like to help me finance any of these ideas, please let me know. I would make them at Funny or Die, but Tim isn’t a huge fan of Will Ferrell’s. He told me not to tell him this, but he thinks while some of Will’s stuff is good, some of it isn’t. Unlike Kevin Spacey, who, according to Tim, has “never made a bad movie. I mean, the guy fuckin’ made K-Pax. Can you even think of a bad movie he’s made? No.”